When Emotions Feel Big

Dear Friend,

This week I sat with disappointment.

I didn’t go looking for it. It just showed up — the way it does — and before I knew it, I was reaching for my invisible backpack, ready to stuff it in right next to its friends frustration and bitterness.

And then I stopped.

Because here’s what I recognized: this was one of those situations I cannot fix. And the moment I named that, my brain did exactly what brains love to do. It started planning. Preparing. Running through every possible thing that could go wrong — as if thinking about it hard enough would somehow change it.

I caught myself doing it. And I stopped again.

I didn’t shame myself for my feelings. I felt them. Here’s what that looked like.

R — Recognize the emotion.

I named it. Disappointment. Frustration. The beginning of bitterness creeping in at the edges. I didn’t judge it. I didn’t tell myself I shouldn’t feel it. I just named it. This is what I’m feeling right now.

E — Experience it in your body.

I noticed where I felt it. The heaviness in my chest. The tightness. I let it be there instead of pushing it down or running back up to my head to analyze it. Emotions are energy. They need to move through us — not get stuffed into an invisible backpack.

S — Sit with God and His truth.

I brought it to Jesus. I told Him all of it — the disappointment, the frustration, the story my fear was trying to write. And then I held my emotion in one hand and His truth in the other. I feel this disappointment. And Jesus, you are on the throne and you are holding all things together.

T — Trust the process.

I chose to trust that I didn’t have to fix this. That He had it. That my job was to lay it down — and not pick it back up.

And then I knew I needed to tell myself a different story than the one my fear was writing.

Because the story that is truer than true is this:

Jesus is on the throne. And He is holding all things together.

I brought my emotions to the foot of the cross and I gave them to Jesus. And friends — there was relief there. Real relief. Not because the situation changed. But because I stopped carrying what was never mine to fix.

I’m being intentionally vague about the details. Because some people I love and care about feel one way about this situation, and some feel the opposite. And the details honestly don’t matter — because here is what I know about you:

You have something you are facing right now that is causing you heartache. And there is probably someone in your life who sees it completely differently than you do.

What do we do with that?

We bring it to the foot of the cross.

We stop carrying what was never ours to carry.

This Week’s Episode Was Made for This Moment

Friend, I recorded this podcast episode before this week happened — and I sat down to write this and realized: what I lived this week is exactly what I teach in it.

It’s called When Worrying Doesn’t Fix It, and it’s the second episode in our summer series, When You Cannot Fix It: Rest for the Weary Soul.

In this episode I talk about the invisible backpack — the worry you absorb from the people you love, the pain you take on and stuff in like it’s yours to solve, the doom clouds you sit under while they’ve already moved on.

I talk about why your body replays their story again and again — and why that is not weak faith. It is a nervous system doing exactly what it was designed to do.

And I talk about what we do instead. Not just spiritually — but practically.

Before You Listen — A Question Worth Sitting With

Our brains are storytelling machines. When something hard happens — when someone we love is struggling, when a situation feels out of control — our brains write a story about it. Fast. And that story usually starts with fear.

Here is what I have learned to do with that story. Not to shame it. Not to stuff it. But to examine it.

Try this before or after you listen to the episode. Grab your journal and work through these questions slowly. Give yourself some time. This is not a quick exercise — it is an invitation to sit with Jesus in the middle of what you are carrying.

Five Questions to Examine the Story You’re Telling Yourself

1. What is the story I am telling myself right now?

Just name it. No shame. No editing. What is the loop playing in your head about this person, this situation, this outcome you are afraid of? Write it down exactly as it sounds inside.

2. Is this story true — or is this the story my fear is writing?

Sit with that for a moment. Your feelings are real and valid. But are they facts? What is actually true right now, as opposed to what your anxious brain is predicting?

3. What is this story costing me?

Your peace? Your presence with the people right in front of you? Your joy in the ordinary moments of today? Name what carrying this story is actually taking from you.

4. What is truer than true?

This is where we go to His promises. What does God say about this situation? About the person you are carrying? About you? You might finish one of these sentences:

Jesus is on the throne, and He is...

The person I am worried about is held by a God who...

I do not have to carry this because...

5. What do I need to lay down at the foot of the cross today?

Name it specifically. The worry. The outcome you are bracing for. The person you have been trying to fix. The story your fear wrote. Give it a name and then give it to Him.

One More Thing Before You Go

Cast all your anxiety on Him — not some of it, not just the anxiety that feels reasonable or spiritual enough — all of it.

“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” — 1 Peter 5:7

The worry you absorbed from a phone call this week. The weight you picked up from someone you love. The story your brain wrote at 2am. All of it.

He is not waiting for you to have it figured out before you come. He is saying — come. Weary. Carrying all of it. Just come.

You were never meant to carry all of this, friend. And you don’t have to.

Listen to this week’s episode: When Worrying Doesn’t Fix It

And if you are carrying something right now that feels too heavy for a podcast episode — I would love to sit with you. At the Kitchen Table with Michelle is a free consultation call. No pressure. No obligation. Just a conversation and a safe place to start.

In God’s peace and joy,

Michelle